Vladmik Svetlana was a reformed Russian. After a bad encounter with some American polizki over a nuclear missile strike (Who knew that Americans so feared nuclear weapons?) Vladmik was in hiding. In truth, Vladmik had been train hopping around the country, looking for a good place to live. There weren’t many places in “Good Old America” with a place to sleep and eat, except for those strange box-shaped structures with doors and windows.
In the Soviet Union, Vladmik and his family had slept in a nicely sized igloo, with indoor air conditioning in case it got to hot in the night. With the temperatures outside reaching a high -50 degrees Celsius in the blazing sun, Vladmik enjoyed swimming laps in the local ice fishing hole. Russia’s most major export, Russian Ice Cubes™ were a prized possession in most countries. Cut from a freshwater lake, a 5 pack of Russian Ice Cubes™ could go for about 5 grand in other countries, but in Russia, they were free to the citizens. Vladmik remembered his childhood fondly. As children, the siblings of the Svetlana clan would gnaw on radiation cubes. In fact, 90% of the population of Mother Russia was immune, the other 10% minority being Americans. As Russians got older, they were immune to any radiation, nuclear or fusion. In fact, most of them enjoyed a nice dose of radiation every once in a while, in celebration of them being Russian. In the forest of Serbia where they lived, the Svetlana family would befriend the local grizzly and polar bear population. Vladmik himself had a friend named Jack, who was part bear, part Russian. Jack was frequently found scratching trees with his back.